My Pants are Stressing Me OUT

I’m madder than a bee that’s been slapped in the face while trying to drink nectar from a flower!
I’ve bought several nice black pants for work/internships from various stores such as New York & Company and Express. I paid $60 for the Express pants and $25 for the NY & C (on sale!)
I’ve noticed BOTH pairs of pants quickly start to get worn on my outer left thigh.
WHY!
I even called Express, complained, and got a new pair sent to me because I thought it was a defect; however,  the same thing happened again! (Oops, sorry Express customer service. You were very helpful, though!)
It looks like I bought these pants at a crummy garage sale (I’m not slapping garage sales because I’ve found some pretty cool things at nice garage sales).
It looks like my cat rubbed against my legs and made the fabric look worn (I love when cats/animals rub against me, it’s so sweet).
My hips don’t lie because it’s only happening on my left outer thigh and it’s not happening from sitting too much because that part of my body does not touch the seat.
I didn’t mind paying $85 total for some nice black pants because I’m trying to look professional. But now I paid $85 to look like a wannabee.
Where did you get your professional attire? How has it held up?

I Think I Was Carjacked?

I’m cruising down HWY172W towards home when I felt a tickle on my fingers.

A WASP!

He was sitting on top of the steering wheel crawling around on my hands. I slowly lifted my left arm and rolled down my front windows and I tried to stay cool.

Then, I kid you not, this wasp stuck his little bee butt at me and shook his stinger at me! He meant business!

I said to him, “Is this a stick up?”

He kept shaking his butt and buzzing around my fingers.

I got off at the next exit and asked him, “Where do you want me to drop you off?”

He jumped off the steering wheel and he floated towards the left.

I turned left and the next stop light he buzzed around my head and flew off.

 

Carjacking over.

I am a Traitor.

Yesterday, I was working at a wedding.

It was probably the biggest wedding I have worked at yet and quite busy.

I noticed one of the guests looks freakishly like my brother, T. He even had the long brown hair! This guest and his date went through the photobooth and when they were signing the photobook I had to say something.

 

The convo…

Me: “This is so weird, but you look just like my brother! He even has long hair!”

Bro-look-alike: “Oh, cool. What does he do?” (weird question, but okay)

Me: “He is studying psychology.”

Bro-look-alike: “Cool, what do you study?”

Me: “Marketing.”

Bro-look-alike as he walks away: “Great!”

 

Marketing!!??!!?! Did I just say Marketing ? I’m a proud English major. Why did I say Marketing?

Now, I have slips of the tongue frequently, but this was bad!

Before I could even correct myself the Bro-look-alike was long gone and a new horde of people had arrived.

I think I meant to say I had a Marketing Internship? I’m not sure.

I feel awful and ashamed.

I am an English major! I’m proud of it!

But today I am a traitor.

 

A Little Birdie Told Me…

 

Since yesterday afternoon, a little goldfinch has been knocking at the front window.

He flew away last night around 8pm, but he was back this morning and still at the window when I got back from my internship.

He’s so cute, but what does he want?

I’ve gone outside a few times to invite him in, but he flies away.

 

I have several theories as to why this birdie is knocking.

1.) He is a reincarnation of Abe Lincoln and he wants to come in.

2.) Those creepy neighbors kitty corner to the house are hiding someone in their basement and the bird is trying to get my attention to come free this person.

3.) He wants to be my friend but gets nervous when I go outside to get him.

4.) He thinks the house is his nest?

birdie

 

 

 

At any rate, it doesn’t really matter what he wants. I like him and hope he stays.

Interweb Etiquette

Today, I required assistance whilst shopping for a new mobile plan on the Internet.

I had several options to choose from:

+call

+email

+chat now with a customer service rep

 

Chat? I’ve never done that before, so I fist pumped and clicked the box. I typed “Hello” in the chat box and then I burst out laughing. What is the chat etiquette?  The rep responded “Hi”

I waited a full minute then quickly hashed out my question and slapped the enter key.

I realized I forgot the most importance advice I have ever heard “ALWAYS PROOF READ”.

Now, this person probably thought I was a moron with my grammar mistakes.

I am a moron.

 

The rep answered my question.

I responded “Thank you”

and promptly slammed my laptop shut and ran away. Panic.

Was I supposed to say, I mean type, goodbye?

 

After I was done being flustered, I opened my laptop back up and obsessively checked my Facebook and two email accounts. There was an email from the website with a “receipt of my chat”.

 

The rep had typed goodbye.

 

 

Everyone is Okay.

Today, I babysat these two cute, little girls for a few hours.

They both weren’t feeling well so I let them pick a movie to watch and relax on the couch. We agreed on Toy Story 3.

I saw Toy Story 3 in theaters (I’m pretty sure) and I remember being sad at the end.

The elder of the two girls is in the question phase: why? why can’t I play outside? why can’t I have treat? why are you sitting there? why can’t you sit here? put my blanket on me.

When Andy gives his Woody, Buzz and the rest of the gang to Bonnie at the end of the movie before he leaves for college, I was completely crying. It’s so precious!

I tried to play it cool, but my sniffling quickly drew the attention of my little friends.

“What’s wrong, Claire?” the elder one asked while the younger one touched my cheek which was streaked in my tears.

“I’m just sad,” I said.

“Why?” the elder asked looking concerned.

“The movie was sad,” I sniffed.

“It’s okay, Claire,” said the elder and the younger nodded furiously. “Everyone is okay.”

“Play?” the younger asked.

 

And then we played castle.

 

What Am I Doing?

I haven’t been blogging as much lately because I’m starting to get a little tired of it.

However, I have been working on other projects such as Flash Fiction stories, running my Flash Fiction Twitter: @OrngeCatFlshFic, and starting a novel.

I’ve definitely tried to write a novel before, but this time I thought I was ready to embark on a this new project armed with the right tools and ideas.

But there’s one tiny problem : NO ONE TOLD ME HOW HARD IT WAS TO WRITE A NOVEL

 

What I try to do is simply sit down with my laptop and type a page a day.

 

What happens is:

I sit down.

Then I want tea.

All my cups are dirty so I wash them.

Then I realize the bathroom sink is dirty to I clean it.

Then I wonder what’s on Twitter.

Then I check Twitter.

Then I check my email.

Usually there’s an email where I have to do something asap.

Then I need a pen to write it down.

Then I can’t find a pen because my desk is a mess.

Then I get a text message.

Then I reply.

My wrist hurts.

I look at the page I was suppose to fill with words.

Dang.

 

It’s like I’m seeing the story buried in the dirt and I only have a tiny shovel to dig it out.  I know it will take a while, but I want to do this. Even though it keeps raining on me!

Also, the setting is weird.

My dialogue stinks.

My characters are still paper thin.

I keep going back and changing the beginning!

 

I feel sleepy just thinking about all this.

I went to a quiet space indoors so I could type for a little while and an ant started to crawl up my leg.

When is this going to click?

Am I even suppose to do this?

 

Am I the “Leaf by Niggle”?

 

 

 

 

 

Who Punched Elva’s Butt?

A few weeks ago, something awful happened.

I was walking to my beloved car, Elva, with B and I noticed something on her right rear.

Someone had dented her in the school parking lot and drove away!

Elva!

I freaked out bad and poor B just had to stand there as I shook my fist and shouted every profanity I could think of to say.

Poor Elva. What did she do? She was just innocently sitting there, minding her own business and some chump smacked her butt. Then this chump just drove off.

 

I was extremely upset about this, but I’m not a complete moron. I am aware of several things:

1.) It was probably (hopefully) some poor college kid like me who punched Elva’s butt and then panicked and drove off. Understandable, but still upsetting.

2.) Elva is an old (but reliable) car and at least it wasn’t my future suped up Porsche.

3.) Everything will be fine.

 

A day or two after, I told someone later the story of what happened to little Elva. Obviously, I was very dramatic and theatrical in my story telling because that’s what I do. This person responded to my story “geeze, calm down. It’ll be fine!”

Excuse me?

No.

I’m allowed to be upset about this!

There are going to be situations in life when something crappy will happen to you for no reason. You are most certainly allowed to be upset. I hate when I’m upset about something and a person tells me to “CALM DOWN” because saying that to me makes me more agitated!

SOMEONE PUNCHED ELVA’S BUTT AND HURT HER!

When someone tells me his or her car’s butt was punched I’m going to say to them “NO! THAT SUCKS! THAT HAPPENED TO ME!” and then I’ll offer advice on where to go from there.

 

Anyway, my dad kicked Elva’s butt from the inside and the dent is mostly gone.

 

The moral of the story is; when something bad happens to you have yourself a little freak out and then call dad to help kick your problem in the butt.

 

I don’t even care about this post.

I really doubt anyone follows my blog anymore but if you do you would have noticed I haven’t blogged in a while.

Meh.

 

I don’t know if it’s the fact that winter still grips Wisconsin.

Or, the fact that I’ve been busy juggling all my school commitments.

Or, my inability to focus lately.

Sadly, all of these have led to me not feeling like myself.

I feel uninspired.

I feel unmotivated.

If I want to be extra dramatic, downtrodden.

 

I feel like I’m sitting on a plateau.

School is going fine. I have been studying and reading just as hard as before, but I’ve been feeling bored with it.

My writing has dried up and it all seems like crap to me.

Flute.. well, I think we all know I can play it but I’m not even close to mastering it.

Even the music on my iPod is boring me.

Even Netflix is boring.

Even candy tastes boring.

 

I wish the snow would  melt

I wish the sun would shine

I wish I wanted to do something right now

I wish I felt like myself

 

I don’t even really care about this post.

I’m also 100% everyone in the world feels this way at some point so I’m not too worried about it.

I’m just going to make myself a mug of tea and read for fun.

 

 

 

I’m So Jealous of My Cat.

Today, I was thinking about my cat.

Well, I think about my cat every day, but today I was thinking deeper a thought about my cat.

I’m so jealous of her.

Lately, I’ve been having two strong feelings: stress and boredom.

 

Boredom:

Wisconsin is definitely not as exciting as England. No fun travel plans, no new people from all over the world, and because I feel like I’m doing the same things over and over again.

I’m washing the same three dang mugs.

I’m reading the same dang things.

I’m sharpening the same two dang pencils.

I’m wearing same two dang coats.

I wake up in the middle of the dang night to stick my dang feet out from the covers because it’s too dang hot in my room!

 

Stressed:

I’m stressed out because I feel like I don’t have time to do anything anymore except get through each thing to get to the next thing.

There are too many things! How did I let this happen again?

I need more sleep.

I need to read lots.

I need to practice flute.

I need to poop once a day (isn’t happening right now).

I need to figure out life.

I’m eternally hungry.

 

 

Back to the cat:

Little Zona just eats, sleeps, plays, and poops.

Zona sleeps to play.

Then she plays to eat.

Then she eats to poop.

Then she takes a nap.

What a wonderful, glorious cycle.

Isn’t that basically our cycle?

I sleep to study.

I study to eat.

Wait, I don’t eat.

I read the 100+ pages a night of reading.

Then I stress out over flute.

Then I watch an episode of Downton Abbey.

Then I write a story for my fiction workshop.

Then I feel bored.

Then I read a book for fun.

Then I stress out.

Because I should be studying or practicing flute.

Then my stomach hurts because I’m nervous.

So then I finally eat.

Then I try to grab a few winks of sleep before repeat.

 

I wish I was a cat.

Specifically orange.

I wonder if Zona likes Downton Abbey.

babyzona