The First Four Years.

I’ve had this blog for 4 years.

4 years ago I needed some help. I needed help to work through things and to channel some of my worries and fears.

June 2011 I experience a painful breakup. I was heartbroken, lost, and depressed. I was heading into my sophomore year of college and I was worried. I was worried about what life would be after I graduated, I worried if I making the best decision by being an English major (F YES), I worried about paying for school.

I also worried because I had struggled with depression on and off the past few years. I was concerned if I didn’t meet my goals or feel like I was doing the right thing I could slip into a dark hole. At that point I honestly wasn’t sure if I’d be able to get myself out of that hole.

My first post is hard for me to read now! I remember tearing up as I hit publish and ran from my computer. Tears from doing something scary and writing it all out on a public blog on the Internet. I felt better when I went back to my computer and saw a positive response from friends on Facebook.

I kept posting.

It helped me.

Through the posts I worked through my sadness, uncomfortable (and awkward) situations, and I shared a piece of myself with the Internets.  Through these last four years I’ve achieved many wonderful things. I graduated from St. Norbert College in December 2013 with a degree in English, found a job, and am going the marry one who infected me with love and happiness.

I achieved everything I was so worried about in that first blog post.

Now I have new challenges! Being a damn adult is hard work. The transition hasn’t always been easy, (I think I’ve only called home crying once or twice..) but I am here.

Now it’s time to start the next chapter!

What am I worried about?

I start to list out my worries in my mind and remember all I’ve achieved since my last list of worries.

I can do anything.

Stay tuned for the next four years.


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